Blessings

Happy Birthday, Becky!!!

Wherever you go
Wherever you land
I'll say what this means to me
I'll do what I can

The fundamental problem
We all need to face
This is important
But I know you're not listening
Oh I know you're not listening

If this was still new to me
I wouldn't understand

But this is what love is for
To be out of place
Gorgeous and alone
Face to face

With no larger problems
That need to be erased
Nothing more important than to know
Someone's listening
Now I know
You'll be listening

-Impossible Germany - Wilco
(last song on the player below)

I got up early and went to Loose Park while it was still cool outside. It was such a beautiful morning.

Several times I wished I had my camera with me, but I was also glad I didn't because it would have likely changed my experience. I've mentioned before that I rarely take pictures, that I forget or choose not to take my camera places, and that even if I do take it, I forget to get it out until it's too late. I also have a bad habit of leaving it places, so a lot of times it's taking up space in someone else's house.

Today was no different than the rest of my life, my camera is at Mom & Dad's. But I was so busy soaking everything in that having a camera and looking at things through its 'eyes' instead of my own would have just been a distraction.*

If I could just get the pictures in my mind out somehow, there's so much in there though. There is a shot of Kori and Becky that I would post here for her birthday if I could. They had just arrived at Harry's on the night of Kori's birthday and were sitting across the table from me. It was around 8:45, so the sun was setting and the light was hitting them in such a way that they were both just glowing. The combination of his darker coloring and her lighter coloring, the color of their eyes...hers blue and his greenish-blue.They just looked so happy, so young, so beautiful...my brother and his wife.

Back to Loose Park....this is a park that I have been to many times in the past. It is my favorite park in KC and isn't too far from home. In fact, it is an absolutely gorgeous drive from there to/from home up either Ward Parkway or State Line.

In the past though, I would go there for exercise. I would walk around the perimeter a few times and then take a few laps around the rose garden to cool down.

Unfortunately, I waited too late in the year. The roses are either all gone or on their way out. I can no longer walk the perimeter, so I was forced to walk the interior of the park at a very slow pace. I had to stop and rest many times. Fortunately, there are benches everywhere...some memorials to others who loved this park like I do.

Being slowed down against my will allowed me to experience and observe new parts of this lovely park that I have been going to for years. I never knew there was an herb garden, or that the fountain/statues on the side of one of the buildings signify the men's and women's restrooms.

I watched kids feeding the ducks, a little girl playing hide and seek with her daddy, people running or just walking like I used to do, people walking their dogs, families having their portraits taken. I got to watch it all at a slower pace, I got to savor it all more, I got to learn new things.

So, in addition to this great sense of loss I felt about all the things I can no longer do (like keep pace with the older couple that passed me...argh), I felt a huge sense of this gift being given to me earlier than most people receive it, and then feeling so blessed.

I overheard one of the moms saying to her little girl, 'We can stop and look at things and smell things if we want, there's no need to rush, there's nowhere else we need to be.'

*all Loose Park photos in this post were taken by
people who remembered to take their camera.