Chemo Eve

"Cancer is getting in the way of being a control freak." This is a quote from Amy who is a young survivor on the breast cancer online support site I visit. I can certainly relate. Your life is not your own anymore, your body is not your own anymore, your time is spoken for by things you really don't want to do. It'll be a different summer than I was planning, but I'm hoping to still be well enough to do some fun things. Time will tell.

I did get to go to work today and accomplished most of the goals I wanted to accomplish this week. I'll just deal with next week when it gets here. I'm just going day-by-day at this point...waiting to see how I'll be feeling. My friend JoAnn is retiring (yea JoAnn!!!), they had a reception for her today so I was very glad that I was able to be there for that. She has been going through breast cancer treatments since last year, she is doing radiation now so she's almost done and can really enjoy her new freedom. I am so happy for her!

Chemo #1 is tomorrow at 9:00am. Everything seems to be in order: I had an echocardiogram today to make sure my heart is strong enough for the chemo drugs, I had an appt. with Barb (Dr. Doane's nurse practitioner) to discuss side effects and how to prevent/combat them, and then I spoke to the financial lady about insurance coverage. I stopped at Osco to fill the prescriptions for Compazine (anti-nausea) and Ativan (sleep/anti-nausea)...always good to have those on hand at all times. I took the first dose of Decadron (steriod/anti-inflammatory) tonight and will continue to take those until Monday.

I have to admit that I'm scared about starting chemo again. One good thing though is that I do sort of know more of what to expect than I did the first time. Fear of the unknown is always the worst.

I just want you all to know how important it is to me to know so many people are praying for me and sending good wishes. It really means a lot...more than I can say.

Good luck at your dance recital tomorrow, Jordan & Ashton!!!